Imaginary Reality

Everytime I think of this thing, at the end, I almost always sit on my bed, think about something.

I remember about things that I really miss. I look at myself 3 years ago, and wondering, how much I wanted to live, catch my dreams, grow old faster, and try so hard to get more than I deserved, or to deserve more than I got.

And then reality drags me to the present, and makes me wonder, how much I want to die.

I've felt almost everything, when my dreams ruined, my heart broken, my old friends became new enemy, people around me blame me on everything happened, everything, but the last but not least thing to struggle for is, my life. sounds so melancholy, but I try so hard not to lose that one.

Mom said, life is like a wheel, there's a time when you're in the bottom, but there will always a time when you're on the top.

I believe 'now' I'm not on the top.

Things We Should/Shouldn't Do

When people say bad things about you, it's hurt. But, it worse when the one who say things such that is the one you love, or at least the one you care about.

People should be honest, yes, we all should, but there's a time when you have to just keep it for yourself. like, when I saw a girl with over-yellowies all over her body, I could say that she's ugly, or so out of style, or what-else-bad things I could say to her, but it wasn't about me, none of my business, no one asked me to be honest, so, it's the time for you to just keep all the thoughts you have, in your mind. take care of it. and try not to spell it out.

It's not about black or white, right or false, truth or lie, noooo... it's just a simple case about what you should do, not what you can do.



People can do everything they want, we can do so, but the question is, should I do that? Should we? In several cases you should, but in the rest of it, you shouldn't.

I'm just a high-schooler, I don't have that much problem in my life, I'm doing good at school, I got friends, and in short I'm happy. But, once again, I'm living a life, as simple as it could be, it's still complicated. Life is not hard, but it is complicated.

Like my sissy said on her blog, which actually his ex-boyfriend who said this thing: Life is hard, compare to what?
Yes! everyone have their own complication, hardness in life. so, the only thing left to do is keep survive. But to keep survive, you don't have to hurt others, right?

I'm not a victim nor the villain, I'm just feeling things. Emotion. I know I'm egoistic, over-optimistic, unwell-organized, over-confident, but I do care about people around me. So, please, you don't have to help me on everything I do, just be good to me, its enough. I'm not asking for more. I know your bad, you know my bad, isn't it kind of inappropriate if you tell those things to the people I do care about, say it to me.

I mean, say it just to me, not to me in front of public, I know your shame, but the difference between you and me is, I don't tell people about your shame. I keep it safe. That's what I should do. I could just spell it out to everyone in the room, but I didn't. because I know, I shouldn't do that. Please, notice something.

I'm in Love, Everybody should be in Love

Love is when your parents told you that you are a piece of blue sky that came to Earth for them. -My Sister’s Keeper

Love is when you are not worry about the future. -He Heals Me-India Arie

Love is when you can see something even when you closed your eyes.

Love is when you can dance without rythm. -Save The Last Dance 2

Love is what makes you never regret of choices you’ve chosen.

Love is what makes you so sure about almost everything. -(500) Days of Summer

Love is what makes you never curse when something makes you wait more than 24 hours. -The Lake House

Love is when you love someone without any demand. -The Ugly Truth

Love is when you’re not seeing something just in black or white. -Grey’s Anatomy

Love is when you think that she’s the best you could ever get. -My Bestfriend’s Girl

Love makes you better than you were. -My Bestfriend’s Girl

Love is when you want to make everything right, not better, but right. -The Proposal

Love is when you really make something come true for someone else. -UP

Love is when someone sends you an airbus and a cupcake to make you stop crying, but all you remember the most is the cupcakes. -Lipstick Jungle

Love is when my GrandPa reads the story to my alzheimer GrandMa for the rest of his life. -Notebook

I'm just typing x-es

[x] You love hoodies.

[x] You love jeans.
[ ] Dogs are better than cats.
[x] It’s hilarious when people get hurt. (it depends)
[ ] Shopping is torture
[ ] Sad movies suck.
[x] You own a car racing game.
[ ] You played with Hot Wheels cars as a kid.
[ ] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[ ] You owned a DS, PS2, N64, or Sega.
[x] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
[x] You have watched sports on TV
[] Gory movies are cool.
[x] You go to your dad for advice.
[ ] You own like a trillion baseball caps.
[ ] You used to collect hockey cards.
[x] Baggy sweats are cool to wear.
[ ] It’s kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun
[ ] You talk with food in your mouth.
[ ] You sleep with your socks on at night.
[x] You have fished at least once

—-YOUR GIRL SIDE—-
[x] You love to shop.
[x] You wear eyeliner.
[x] You wear the color pink. (sometimes)
[x] You go to your mom to talk.
[ ] You consider cheerleading a sport.
[ ] You hate wearing the color black.
[x] You like going to the mall.
[x] You like wearing jewelry.
[x] You cried watching The Notebook.
[x] Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
[x] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[ ] You don’t like the movie Star Wars
[x] You are/were in gymnastics
[x] It takes you around one hour to shower and get dressed
[ ] You smile a lot more than you should.
[x] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like.
[x] You like wearing dresses when you can.
[x] You like wearing high heel shoes.
[x] You used to play with dolls as little kid.
[x] You like putting make-up on others.
[x] You like being the star of everything.
[ ] Pink is one of your favorite colors.

Appearance •

[x] I have many scars.
[x] I tan easily. (under the sun while swimming?yes!)
[x] I wish my hair was a different color.
[ ] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[x] I’ve had/have braces.
[ ] I have more than two piercings.
[ ] I have / had piercings in places besides my ears.

• Embarrassment •

[ ] I’ve slipped out a “lol” in a spoken conversation.
[ ] Disney movies still make me cry.
[x] I’ve laughed so hard I’ve cried.
[x] I’ve glued my hand to something.
[x] I’ve laughed ’til some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
[x] I’ve had my pants rip in public.

• Health •

[x] I’ve gotten stitches.
[ ] Broken a bone.
[ ] I’ve had my tonsils removed.
[x] I’ve sat in a doctor’s office with a friend.
[x] I’ve had my wisdom teeth removed.
[x] I’ve had serious surgery.
[ ] I’ve had chicken pox.

• Traveling •

[ ] I’ve driven / ridden over 200 miles in one day.
[x] I’ve been on a plane.
[ ] I’ve been to Canada.
[ ] I’ve been to Cuba.
[ ] I’ve been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I’ve been to Ottawa.
[ ] I’ve gone to Sudbury.
[ ] I’ve been to the Caribbean.
[ ] I’ve been to Europe.
[x] I’ve been to Singapore.

• Experiences •

[x] I’ve gotten lost in my city.
[x] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[ ] I’ve wished on a shooting star.
[x] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[ ] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
[ ] I’ve pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[x] I’ve kicked a guy where it hurts.
[ ] I’ve been to a casino.
[ ] I’ve been skydiving.
[ ] I’ve gone skinny-dipping.
[ ] I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[x] I’ve crashed a car.
[ ] I’ve been skiing.
[ ] I’ve been in a musical.
[ ] I’ve caught a snowflake or snow on my tongue.
[ ] I’ve seen the Northern Lights.
[x] I’ve sat on a rooftop at night.
[x] I’ve played a prank on someone.
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.

• Relationships •

[x] I’m single.
[ ] I’m in a relationship.
[ ] I’m almost engaged.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[ ] I’ve gotten divorced.
[x] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
[x] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[ ] I don’t believe in love

• Honesty / Crime •

[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
[ ] I’ve snuck out.
[x] I’ve lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
[x] I’ve ran a red light.
[ ] I’ve witnessed a crime.
[ ] I’ve been in a fist fight.
[ ] I’ve been (almost) arrested.

• Death and Suicide •
[x] I’m afraid of dying.
[x] I hate funerals.
[x] I’ve seen someone / something dying.
[x] Someone close to me has attempted / committed suicide.
[x] I’ve planned my own suicide before.
[ ] I’ve written a eulogy for myself.

• Materialism •
[ ] I own over 5 rap CD’s.
[ ] I have an unhealthy obsession with anime / manga.
[ ] I own something from Pac Sun.
[x] I collected comic books.
[x] I own something from The Gap.
[ ] I own something I got on E-Bay.
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie

• Random •

[x] I can sing well.
[ ] Stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[x] I open up to others easily
[x] I watch the news.
[ ] Don’t kill bugs/don’t like to
[x] I sing in the shower.
[x] I am a morning person.
[x] I am a sports fanatic.
[x] I twirl my hair.
[x] I care about grammar.
[x] I love spam.
[ ] I’ve copied more than 30 CD’s in a day.
[x] I bake well.
[x]My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red, blue, black, purple, or orange.
[ ] I would wear pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[x] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes
[x] I eat fast food weekly.
[x] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[ ] I can’t sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[x] I like white chocolate.

Girl LOVES The Man with The Guitar

Remember, Girl with The Moves Loves The Boy with The Guitar??! I'm not a dancer, or a girl with the moves, BUT, I LOVE Man with The Guitar!!

Since about months ago, I got impressed by someone. A man with a guitar, well, I'll never tell anyone who is he, oh, well, the identity isn't really the thing. The thing is... I got impressed by the guitar, since then... I always think that the hottest guy on earth probably The man with the guitar. Hahaha. When he played his chords, I was like really really really want to hug.... Upsss!! Not the man, I mean.. the guitar. Oh well, forget it. I never been this crazy, I guess that is the wildest thought I've ever had in past 16 years. What I'm really crazy about is... the man with the guitar.

The Man with The Guitar :

Chris Martin

Billy Joe Armstrong

Ariel 'Peterpan'

Adam Sandler

John Mayer

Lale 'Maliq n D'Essentials'

MR.A-Z

My boy, Gabe Bondoc, xoxo

Michael Buble :>

The Temper Trap's guitarist!!

Sir Paul McCartney, my fave legend!!!

See?! one of them might be the hottest man on earth, that's why, Girl LOVES The Man with The Guitar!
P.S : I just spared a fact/gossip about The Temper Trap's guitarist with my sissy! hihi, xoxo.
Bekasi, April 2010.
by Indrafebrina

Revolutionary Talks

Since I was about 10, I never wanted to be a Mom. first, it's gonna hurt me, It's a troublesome, and It's a chaos. I even blacked out in my biology class, when we were studying about the reproduction. Okay, I'm way too young to think about something like this. I don't even want to try to think about this kinda thing.
but, one day, my bestfriend told me something. She wasn't talk about religion, merit or reward for moral conduct, sin, or even something like it was my duty or obligation as a moslem. no, she wasn't talking about any of that.
She taught me in a simple, but touch-y language, simple, but it made me realized that I was wrong.
Beb, nyokap lo aja mau ngelahirin elo, masa lo gak mau ngelahirin cucunya, she said on the phone, when we had a talk about everything we haven't talk about. And, blah! I realized, her appearance might be look like a silly 12 years old girl, but she's way more mature than me, hahaha. That is what I called, Revolutionary talks. Thank you, Amelia.

Things Just Come and Go, So do Friends

Beberapa hal membuka mata saya lebar-lebar, it was like... popped out of its hole. kinda scary. seperti kalimat : you don't know a good thing, till it's gone. Yap! that is so right. richtig. Gak cuma boys yang come and go, even friends... just like an MRT in the city hall, come and go. never stays, unless it's broken. Orang-orang terdekat saya, pergi dan datang.
Saya bukan antisosial or something, I love new people, tapi dibanding kenal dengan orang-orang baru, saya lebih senang mempertahankan yang sudah saya punya. I'll leave no one, except they asked me to.
Saya ingat, perbincangan ringan saya dengan beberapa teman lama, saya senang, when we started talk about the past, we laugh. Ya, kita tertawa, saya senang di bagian saya bisa melihat ke belakang, dan tertawa senang, melihat betapa dungunya saya waktu itu, betapa noraknya kami.
Ah, biarin, norak-norak bahagia, kata salah satu sahabat saya. Look at us now, do we really happy? I guess no. we're stuck in a place full of hope and plans. and it SUCKS!!
Saya jadi ingat ada orang yang dulu dekat banget sama saya, we're like twins, so nsync. yang saya sesali, saya gak bisa melihat ke belakang bersamanya ditemani sepiring spagetti PapaRons favorit kami dengan tawa, kami gak bisa. because there's something so wrong between us. I dunno which part I was missing. I don't have any idea.
Ada lagi seorang yang lumayan dekat dengan saya, orang yang suka menemani saya kemana-mana, yang paling saya ingat dia nemenin saya ke penjahit buat jahit name tag seragam saya, he was like my brother. sayangnya, people are different, because they're changing. some people went to the west, and some other went to south east, we're never gonna have the same direction. that's why we're different.
sekali lagi saya tidak bisa melihat ke belakang sambil tertawa.

Everything is never gonna be the same, even if we want everything just the way it was. we change everyday, meet new people, start a new day, make a new plan, have a new hope, that's life. Life's suck, but instead of Suck, Life never stops.

Oleh sebab itu, saya mempertahankan agar 2 atau 5 tahun lagi, saya bisa melihat ke masa ini sambil tertawa bersama sahabat-sahabat saya sekarang, ditemani dengan apapun yang kami sukai dimasa ini dan yang akan datang. Tapi, kan hidup gak selesai gitu aja, Beb, kata sahabat saya itu sambil menelan french friesnya.

Bekasi, 17 April 2010
by Indrafebrina

Singapore = B.L.A.S.T

My trip to Singapore was a blast!! worth skipping everything!

me at The Merlion Park, Raffles, Singapore

Mom & Dad

me at the Merlion Park

Me, Mom, and Gloria, the cast of Madagascar the Movie

Me with the Penguins, they are cute, aren't they?

Me with my Mom @ Universal Studios, Hollywood Coast

Me @ universal studios entrance

Me @ ION, Orchard Word, heaven for shopaholic

me at the Orchard Road, took a walk--waited for the city bus

at Changi International Airport with my Dad

Me ate udon, and tempura, uyuuum!!

Singapore, April 2010
by Indrafebrina

P.S: I'm gonna go there again with the rest of my family! :))
x.o.x.o

The Temper Trap

I knew this super-band from my sissy, Maulina, and a besties of mine, Amelia. My sissy watched them live in Frankfurt, and she said it was so great. They were awesome back there. And when I already memorized almost all of their songs, they came up in public, soundtrack of VJ Hunt 2010, but before that, they were the OST of 500 Days of Summer (Zooey Deschanel's movie). and now, I'm damn in love with them. Satu-satunya band yang bisa saya sejajarkan dengan Coldplay di hati saya. :) My fave songs are, Fader, and also Sweet Disposition. :)

P.S : Oh, and I am so damn proud to say this : the vocalist, Dougi Mandagi is an Indonesian:D
P.S.S.: Oh, my sissy had a crush with the guitarist, haha how lucky is she!!

Bandung, 16 April 2010
By Indrafebrina

Singapore, 2010

I went to Singapore last week, it was BLAST!! I swear, it was so great! I went to Universal Studio, I went to the Madagascar, Far Far Away land, Ancient Egypt, New York, Hollywood, Sci-Fi City.
In Shrek Cage, I went to Enchanted Airways, and Shrek 4D. I went to see the show in Hollywood coast, The Mummy coasters. and my very favorite is The Mummy Coaster, dunno why it was so FUN. It was like, we were in a huge blender, and they shaked us, one word : COOL.
I went to Orchard Road, Safari Night in Woodlands, Ang Mo Kio, City Hall, Far East, Tangs, Takashimaya, ION, Orchard is a huge shopping city, you can find all you want, just anywhere.
I went to Woodlands, and did a tram ride at night, my fave animal was a huge bear. it didn't look as funny as Pho in KungFu Panda, but still he was so charming.



I ate a very delicious toast in Ya Kun Kaya, the Kaya butter toast was so great. Melted...ummh deliciosooo. and, the weird-y thing is.. they served the toast with half done egg, I don't really like the egg, but I love the coffee, it was even better than my fave frapuccino Starbucks, I swear. Fyi, I ate it twice. well, I know I'm fat, and feel suck everytime I want more food, but hey... I do excercise. I dance, I play softball, badminton, so it wasn't a-very-guilty-pleasure. guilty but not so guilty. well, just forget it already, okay?!
So, I enjoy my trip, you guys should try my trip, don't take taxi, take the city bus, and the MRT, it was really pleasant, and waaaay much cheaper. Oh, I bought a universal goodie bag, really great, I showed it to my classmates, and they said : woah! hahahaha, naaah. I didn't show it to anyone. just wore it to school.
Ooooh, and I met a boy, he's funny, about years old, his name was Henry, and all he could say is only : naaaaah, no, and neii. it's just the same : No? haha, funny lil boy!!

The famous Changi Airport

Singapore, April 2010
by Indrafebrina
P.S: gonna post my pics on this blog later, and also my facebook, xoxo.
keep visit&follow me guys, lols :)

Coolest Sport, ever!

I saw one of body soap commercial advertisement, Nadine Candrawinata was in that ad. I was like, couldn't stop thinking about the whole thing, really, not the soap, nor the model, but the thing she did. She's surfing in that commercial Ad. And, that thing became one of my dreams, and I'll make sure I'll do that before my 17th birthday. Hope so.

Bali, Indonesia

If you're looking for the greatest place to refresh your mind, I would say, Bali. The culture, the temperature, the weather, the view, the people, the rice field, the bird park, the reptil park, the Ubud, the Uluwatu, Kuta, Seminyak, Tanjung Benoa, everything is just so perfect.



I'm not surprise if Bali is the setting of Julia Robert's umpcoming movie, Bali is just so perfect. Perfect. One of my fave Tvserie from Korea, Love in Bali, took place in Uluwatu, and a beautiful beach, i don't know where... but still in Bali, and I guess it was Dreamland in Pecatu Resort. seems like it was it.



The culture, people were wearing kebaya and somewhat in their head, with gold colour domination, and it was like... WOW. it was friday, and it was great to see them, had lunch, and laugh together after they prayed in the Uluwatu Temple.
The weather, it was sunny, shiny, but it wasn't hot. it wasn't hot as hot as Jakarta. it was great, and I really love stratocumulus cloud. it was white, and shape-y.
The sport, diving, snorkeling, parasailing, flying fish, it was all cool.
The bird park, more than 2000 species, and the birds were so playful and funny.
It was a blast.




I couldn't stop singing :

Summer Jam, tonight hotties wear the prada skirts
Real tight
Temperature is rising feel the real hot
In the heat of the night
Moonlight, party won't stop
Until the morning light
Temperature is rising feel the real hot
In the heat of the night
Heat of the night


Can't get you out of my mind
I can't lie
Cause a girl like you is so hard to find
I'm waiting for the day to make you mind..
Cause I can't take it

It ain't nothing but a summer jam
Brown skin and cinnamon tans, oooh
This ain't nothing but a summer jam
We're gonna party as much as we can
As much as we can
Much as we can


Craig David-Summer Jam
Bali, November 2009
By Indrafebrina